Posts Tagged ‘Louisiana’

Writing about Cathy’s visit made me remember when we’d first moved down to New Orleans and Ali was still a completely brash little Jersey Girl in the making.

Alison was headed into middle school, and really looking forward to starting, but I watched her spirits dip a little lower each day that she failed to really click with new friends. A few weeks into the term, she came home looking positively perplexed.

“Mom,” she said, shaking her head, “I don’t get it. These girls? They were really nice to me when I took the school tour, and now they just shut up whenever I get close. So today I walked up to the group and asked if I’d done anything wrong- why weren’t they talking to me?” She shook her head when I asked what they’d answered. “They just got really upset, and kind of stuttered and stuff. One of them finally said ‘That’s what you did! We don’t say things like that! You’re so weird!’”

Over time, Ali figured out how to navigate the strange currents between Mason and Dixon, though I’d never seen the changes so much as when her friends came together and needed Alison to act as their cultural translator.

It made me realize she’s become a sort of southern belle with balls- not a bad thing to be. Well mannered, polite, but still able to kick your ass.

This is just…uh…
just…
wow.

We just came out of a bitch of a Legislative session. I won’t go into the hairy details, but it was painful, drawn out, and exhausting. Which, I suppose, makes this performance a perfect representation:

(Youtube vid here)

I had to track this down after it was mentioned by the Times-Pic’s Capital bureau chief in a post-session wrap up live chat:

Q: [Comment From Jk]
Why was Hurricane Chris allowed to perform a rap song in the well of the House? Don’t they have anything better to do?

A:in truth a lot of songs are sung at the House podium, lot of performers come by ….it was really nothing that new…Cajun and country music — and patriotic songs… tend to be the norm.

I read that and snickered, figuring it was just some yokel offended by rap in those hallowed halls. But no, it was horrendous on too many levels to be real. Still, I wasn’t quite sure I trusted my ears, so I went and looked up the lyrics.

Classy, y’all:

She fine den a bitch ass and her tits
Thick in tha hips every nig want her
Call her Halle Berry, Halle Berry
Halle Berry, Halle Berry
She walkin like a model
Hands on your knees
Scrub the ground
She aint nothing but a tease
Halle Berry, Halle Berry
Halle Berry, Halle Berry

So, once again, we look like morons. The one upside is that I know Piyush had a heart attack over this, which makes the national scorn almost worth it…

Okay, y’all.

So I thought last year’s prom was weird? I had no idea.

I was told (again) only 2 days before Prom that it was coming up. And (again) I went into “OMG, are you KIDDING me with this last minute stuff?!” mode, and (again) she looked at me like I was nuts.

Me: Whaddya mean it’s no big deal?
Her:Just what I said. God mom, chill.
Me:Where are we gonna get everything in a day and a half?! A dress? Shoes? Alison, this is ridiculous! (deep breath) Okay, okay.
Her:
Me: Alright, at least tell me what the theme is?
Her: Crawfish boil.
Me, post long-pause: Your prom theme is “crawfish boil?”
Her: No. Prom IS a crawfish boil. And it’s casual dress.

So here’s Alison’s classy classy prom photo- she wouldn’t stand still, but it’s what I got.

She wore shorts.

My mother is laughing her ass off at me in heaven, you know- I skipped prom altogether as being too bourgeois or whatever. So karma again bites me in the ass.

Ah well. It’s the only thing she’s done in years that’s saved me money.

Last week I received the fantastic news that great friends from France are coming to stay over the summer, and we swung into high-planning mode.

We haven’t had newbies come in a long time, so this’ll be great fun. There’s a bit of performance anxiety- New Orleans may be the most European city in the US, but how does it stack up to actual Europe, after all?

Well, the closest thing we have to castles are plantations, so we’re going to take a day and do a tour, with an overnight stay in the most notorious of the bunch, the Myrtles.

I remembered seeing that the show Ghost Hunters had done an episode there, so I took to YouTube to see if I could find it. There was “the reveal,” which was grainy and you couldn’t tell a damn thing.

But…even better:

So I’m watching this, waiting for something…anything…and when the creepy ghost finally appears it’s clearly one of our massive roaches coming in for a closer look.

There are quite a few of these videos where people just really want to think they’ve seen something…but clearly these nice folks are from someplace safe where they don’t recognize these buggers.

On our brief tour through southwestern Louisiana, we stopped in Crowley while we waited for a crawfish place in the next town to open for dinner. Charlie actually would have liked to tour a rice farm and/or processing plant (it’s a guy thing), but there were no such immediately apparent establishments.

Instead, we just drove around. It’s a nice little town with some interesting touches.

This certainly got my attention more than a typical neighborhood watch sign.

The streetsigns are still in both English and French…

And then we ran into this odd car. Charlie got went to take a closer look, and saw the owner was sitting under his carpark, repairing his accessories. It’s something that was put together for a charity, and he drives in all the parades. He’s always accepting donations- both for the car and for the charity.

What most surprised me was a) How many commercially recognizable items there were (likely from Happy Meals and suchlike) and b) How many vaguely naughty ones there were. Ah well. I guess we all contribute our own unique talents.

We left behind $5 for the car and $5 for the charity. Click on the thumbnails for a closer look.

In our bayou trek, Charlie booked us into a casino/hotel in Saint Charles, Louisiana. It’s right on the south western edge of the state, and…well, it’s about what you’d expect.

Well, not quite. It’s been infected by that overly familiar/cutesy thing- what Southwest Air does taken to an extreme.

They’ve got a rustic western thing going on- there was an extreme closeup of a bull over the toiletbowl, and cow chairs in the main room- but also a sort of wiseass-y thing that has nothing to do with cowboys.

Ain’t it just edgy? Ain’t it just cuttin’ edge? Ug.

I got frighteningly excited by the idea of eating at their Jack Daniel’s resturant as shown in their mandatory in room folio. If this was what the room looked like, could you imagine?

Turned out that, no, we couldn’t imagine. We took one look inside, looked at each other and strode very quickly down the hall. The place was filled with not only the anticipated horrendous decor but…kids. Lots and lots and lots of kids. Maybe the parents were trying to get ‘em liquored up & drowsy so they (the parents) could go play in the casino in peace. I dunno, but it was a madhouse.

Here’s a few more shots- more cow room decor, the lobby and possibly my favorite- Frank Lloyd Wright meets Jesus in the Casino checkin area.

So today’s the Louisiana primary. We weren’t supposed to matter- we never matter. I’ve never actually lived in a state where, from a primary standpoint, the game wasn’t over by the time it was our turn.

We had a very civic-minded day, actually. First it was Alison’s mock-trial scrimmage at the big courthouse on Poydras. Since it’s essentially a big argument, she did all too well, natch.

It was from there to the polling place, where I had a little crisis of confidence. I really REALLY wanted to vote for Hillary. Months ago, anyway. You know…before.

Before all the sort of iffy, racial sounding comments. Before the nastiness. Before her husband went off the frigging rails, fer godsakes! Bill! Dude! Suck it up! Your wife managed to hold it together in public when you couldn’t button your fly- try looking like an ex-president and not like a petulant snot whydontcha?!

I considered going down to listen to him speak yesterday, cause, well, you know how it is. Every time I hear Bush speaking I sigh wistfully and think about what it was like when we had a president who was…oh…I don’t know…coherent, for a start. Seeing this new and not-so-improved Bill is just sad.

Plus, when I read the coverage of the event, it’s clear where this region’s vote is going anyway. Obama had a 500 person overflow at his event. Bill/Hill couldn’t fill the place. She didn’t even show up, just sent him, and he got kinda pissy. Said we ‘owed’ her, so we’d better pay up.

That was the nail in the coffin. I was about 95% sure I was pushing the Obama button, but that did it. Still feels a little like I broke up with the Clintons. Sorry, guys, I guess I just need some space.

The scarier thing was that there was a short column in the paper about how Huckabee could take the other side of the aisle. That man scares the bejabbers out of me.